If I could tell you how it feels was the internal mantra that I used in my early days of therapy. Even though I yearned to share with friends and family how it felt to live with a past full of abuse and neglect, I couldn’t say the words.
The painful memories and shame of my trauma were palpable. That shame kept me from exclaiming, “I’m a survivor!”
I felt the safest hiding behind the mask of what I thought was “normal.” One day, in answer to my friend’s question of how it felt to live with PTSD, I wrote a poem and risked the vulnerability of sharing it with family and close friends.
Soon writing became my way of expressing how it feels to try and cope with, relate to, and safely express my feelings. What I couldn’t verbalize, I found I could write.
Writing is my light from the darkness and has taken the form of books, blog posts, articles and simple prose. To be seen, to be heard, and to connect can be a catalyst for growth and change.
Sometimes we just want to say, “I may look okay on the outside but, If I could really tell you how it feels…”
From the Introduction of If I Could Tell You How It Feels ….. Release date soon on Amazon in both paperback and ebook formats.