Whispers in the Night

Whispers in the night bring memory
into full focus.
A series of never-ending still photographs
posed and etched onto and into the mind.
Perhaps fading a bit in color, smell, taste, and touch
but never completely melting away.

©words and photo: Alexis Rose

Thank you for reading my memoir, Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph

 

 

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Two Roses

Two roses stand strong
within their protective thorns.
Entwined by years of friendship 
they share secrets, thoughts, laughter, and tears.
They sway with the whispering breeze
as they bloom and grow.
Mesmerizing all with the wisdom of their ageless beauty. 

2-roses

©Alexis Rose; image: pexels.com

 

Thank you for reading my memoir, Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph

 

 

Meet The Author: Alexis Rose- Non Fiction Author #amreading #health #author

Thank You, Kim. I’m so excited to be one of the author’s that Kim interviewed this month on her blog. Check out the interview and be sure and follow her blog too!

Author, Kim Knight

Untangled: A story of resilience, courage, and triumph by [Rose, Alexis]

Okay we’re on a roll, the final author for this month is Alexis Rose! Alexis touches on very important issues that many people face in life. It’s a pleasure to interview her. Let’s get to know her style… over to you Ms. Rose

Hello nice to meet you! Tell us a bit about you where are you from and other than writing what else do you enjoy?

Hello, Thank You for including me in your author spotlight, Kim. My name is Alexis Rose and I live in Minnesota. Besides writing, I love to be with my family and friends. I unwind by practicing yoga and spending time outside. I work part-time doing the marketing for a couple of wellness centers, and enjoy teaching beginning writing classes.

How did you start writing? What was your inspiration to create?

Writing came into my life purely by accident. I had never written anything…

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Why I Write

It’s been two weeks since I finished collaborating on a new writing project. Since then,  I have allowed myself precious time to sit on my deck and reflect over the whirlwind of the past year. Releasing Untangled, emerging from the shadows of silence, blogging, speaking to groups, and now preparing to pitch our project, I ask myself, Why do I write?

When I speak to groups and open it up for questions, I’m almost always asked, what made you write a book, or have you always been a writer? The answer to both is, “no!” I never wrote anything beyond copy for ads, or random newsletter articles for my jobs before 2011. I didn’t keep a journal, never was a huge letter writer, I really never gave writing a thought.

When I began therapy my therapist suggested that I journal. Most of us have been told by our therapist’s to journal our thoughts and feelings. I despised journaling. I would become so emotional, because often, the pages looked like one big opus for wanting to end my life. I would literally tear up the pages after I wrote them, despondent because I couldn’t separate my feelings from what I wanted to write about. It was all emotion and no substance, no thoughts, no depth and it felt destructive. So I refused to continue to journal.

But, I found myself writing emails to my therapist and we would talk about them at our next session. It was becoming evident that I was looking for a way to write down my thoughts. My therapist went to a conference on PTSD. At the conference, he learned that when clients journaled on a keyboard, (not pen and paper) that it was easier for them to keep journaling. The act of using a keyboard was incorporating bilateral stimulation which helped put some distance between the terrible trauma and intense feelings and they were able to keep writing longer. That made perfect sense to me, so I began to use writing as a healing tool.

Writing gave me the courage I needed to address the pain I was feeling. I would write even when I thought I had nothing to write about. At first, I strictly used it for bilateral stimulation. I would write and send what I wrote off to my therapist. I started to find that I was able to write down what I couldn’t say aloud.  At first, I think it provided distance from having to use my voice, but then I found it actually gave me a voice.  When I still couldn’t speak a truth, I found if I read it out loud to my therapist, that I was speaking the truth.

Eight years after that first assignment to journal on a keyboard, I have written four books, had a number of published articles and enjoy engaging on my blog. I reflect on writing from a different perspective. Now, I write because I love to share what I’m thinking, feeling or musing over. I write because I’ve had feedback from others, to help give them a voice, to put feelings into words that they may be unable to describe. Writing is a way to be seen and heard, especially by a group who suffers from mental illness and are often marginalized.

I write because I will no longer be shamed into silence. But, I also control the volume of my voice. I want to be effective in destigmatizing mental illness, invisible illness, for me, PTSD. I know that I’m a quiet word of mouth writer. It fits my personality. I love the writers who are more vocal, and speak with confidence and often, they know the volume of their voice and can reach a much wider audience.

I write because it fills my cup, it satisfies my creativity and it keeps me connected to the world. I care deeply about what I write and share, hoping that the connection between us continues to grow. Sometimes that starts with a simple written word.

Why do you write?

 

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Thank you for reading my memoir, Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph

 

 

 

How Would You Describe Wisdom?

I think to myself how would I describe wisdom if I were asked? I understand how vague that term has become, but still, if I were asked to define what that word means to me, I would say wisdom is the ability to be present. When possible, to try and take a holistic view of a situation and see it from a well-rounded, compassionate perspective without initial judgment.

Of course, there may be, or have been situations in our lives, where we need to trust that what’s happening is dangerous, listen to our innate wisdom and protect ourselves so we can survive. That’s the beauty of inner wisdom, our survival mechanisms, and I, for one, am grateful every day for the wisdom I employed to survive my past.

The times when people have said to me, “you are wise” it was because I was responding to them in a fully present state. I was listening to what they were saying both verbally and nonverbally. I wasn’t thinking ahead to what I was going to say next, I wasn’t distracted by the noises that were external or internal. I was simply able to hear what they were saying and/or asking and respond in a way that was thoughtful and respectful. And truthfully, sometimes the wisest thing I have said to another person, and to myself is, I’m simply not able to be objective, or helpful. There are still some topics that when placed in front of me, I will react from a purely emotional place. No objectivity, compassion or understanding anywhere in my realm of consciousness. I understand that’s an effect of my trauma.

There are times that I still have to work hard at staying present. There are times when that is one of my most frustrating and biggest challenges. When I’m dealing with flashbacks, and triggers, staying present is often that elusive tool, that I know I have to employ. I think a lot of people, especially those of us who have been through trauma would say that staying present is a constant work in progress. Besides the normal monkey mind we all contend with, I also experience the challenge of climbing out of the vortex’s of the past, that pull me away, sometimes many times a day.

I believe as time goes on, I’m able to be present more often. I notice the birds singing outside the window, the wind gently blowing, the lawn mower of my neighbor, the noise of kids playing at the nearby playground and the sky. I love the sky!  It’s paying attention to the present that keeps me grounded in the wise place where I continue to heal, grow, change and live.

What does wisdom mean to you?

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Thank you for reading my memoir, Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph