Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph (very special sale today)

After eight years of intense therapy for my PTSD, the past two weeks have me settling into a positive, new phase on my healing journey. To celebrate, I am offering a special sale today on the ebook version of my memoir, Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph. 

Enjoy this excerpt from the first chapter…if you would like to read the book follow the link at the bottom of the post to download it from Amazon. Thanks, Alexis

What’s a house got to do with it?

Most of us remember the nuances of the houses we grew up in. We know the nooks and crannies, and the sounds the house makes when it settles and groans. We know the clicking noise of the furnace kicking in, the whistling sound of the wind blowing through the windows, and how the gate slams as someone makes their way to the door. We can trust our way in the dark during power outages or to sneak food from the refrigerator at midnight because we know where the furniture is and where the stairs begin and end.

I lived in three different houses growing up, the first two in Michigan and the third in Minnesota. Each move brought more carpeting.  I lost the early warning system that wooden floors and creaky steps gave me as the carpet grew wall-to-wall.

The first nine years of my life I lived in Grant. I remember everything about that house. I could draw it in great detail; actually, I could draw all three houses in great detail. I liked this house the best, not only because the floors and stairs were wooden and creaky, but because I shared it with all my siblings at the same time. My parent’s attention was divided between the four of us children. When I was nine and we moved to the suburbs, the attention shifted away from my siblings and the spotlight fell directly on me.

Inside that first house, my bedroom was my refuge because of the windows. My sister and I had beds beneath the two windows looking out towards the front of the house. There was another window with a window-seat on the side of the room that faced the neighbor’s house. During the day, I would sit on the window-seat and read. Most nights as I lay in bed, I would turn my head towards that same window and imagine fire consuming the side of the neighbor’s house; intense bright orange flames licking high into the air. I was young but I was already finding ways to externalize the pain that was coursing through my body.

The living room was large and filled with gray furniture covered in thick plastic that you stuck to in the summer and froze on in the winter. The dining room had a fireplace along one wall, double glass doors leading to a porch, and a swinging door leading into the kitchen. That swinging door would make an earsplitting banging sound when an angry parent would smack it open when coming into or going out of the dining room. The kitchen had ugly dark green linoleum and two steps leading from it that either led you outside or if you turned right, led you down a steep set of stairs into the basement. The basement had a large room where the boys would use their wood burning sets and a corner where my father had his easel set up, a place where he would draw charcoal portraits of the family and neighbors.

Aside from the linoleum in the kitchen and the concrete of the basement, the rest of the house had hardwood floors and stairs. A few area rugs covered the center of the rooms but they did nothing to mask the sound of people walking or climbing the stairs.

The backyard seemed huge to me as a little girl.  We had a few apple trees, cattails growing behind the garage, and a round swimming pool. I remember the wild raspberries that grew against the chain link fence.

I played alone in that backyard for long periods of time. My refuge was behind the garage in a corner along the neighbor’s fence. There I stayed hidden, out of sight from all the windows on the back of the house and the porch. Standing behind the garage, hearing my heart beat like a hummingbird, I petted the cattails that grew by the fence. I picked the tiny purple violets to make bouquets that I would grip as tightly if they were my last friends in the world. I didn’t care that they wilted with the heat of my hands; I just wanted to look at the delicate petals and drink in their color. It was a solitary existence but solitary was far better than any kind of attention that I received inside of that house.

The energy inside our house was super-charged. Tension crackled in the air like electricity, no matter how many of us were inside. If there wasn’t some kind of abuse going on, there was a silence that hung so thick and heavy that I would find myself looking down at the floor, or fidgeting, not knowing what to do with your hands. Opera or classical music sometimes blared from the stereo, a macabre contrast to the silence. At other times the volume of the music would alert us to what was going to happen next; the rising crescendo seemed to egg my parents on and steel us for explosive abuse.

excerpt from chapter one, Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph

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https://www.amazon.com/Untangled-story-resilience-courage-triumph-ebook/dp/B013XA4856

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19 thoughts on “Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph (very special sale today)

  1. Alexis Rose May 14, 2017 / 3:02 am

    Thank you so, so much! We have to hold on to the positive steps, don’t we.

    Like

  2. Chaplain Doll May 14, 2017 / 1:37 am

    I am so happy to hear you are moving into a more positive and new phase in your healing. Each positive step is such an enormous accomplishment in overcoming our Trauma.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. oneta hayes May 12, 2017 / 10:56 pm

    Thanks, Alexis. It appears to be free only if I join they Prime membership. Perhaps I will wait until tomorrow and pay for it. Not unreasonably high. However, I guess I could join their offer today and cancel if I want to later. I’ll check more. Hope you do well with your sales.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Alexis Rose May 12, 2017 / 10:50 pm

    That means the world to me Gina! Love to you dear friend! ❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Singledust May 12, 2017 / 10:47 pm

    beautiful and thank you! you are amazing and i really am inspired by your writing and journey! lots of love!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Alexis Rose May 12, 2017 / 10:45 pm

    Its free today for all Kindle users for another six hours. If you click to buy it, you should not be charged. Let me know. Tomorrow it goes back $4.99 for Kindle and $12.95 paperback. All on Amazon.

    Like

  7. oneta hayes May 12, 2017 / 10:30 pm

    Alexis, I would love to have your book Untangled, for kindle, bur it looks like I can only get it by joining Amazon’s Prime which I don’t want to do. Where else can I find it?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. divinemusings8 May 12, 2017 / 3:28 pm

    Beautiful writing. I also grew up in an abusive home. Thank you for your courage.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Alexis Rose May 12, 2017 / 2:06 pm

    I cant even tell you what it means to me that you already purchased Untangled. Thank You so much! I absolutely understand that you need light and cheerful as you face the challenges of your health right now. I look forward to your feedback when you read the book someday. Take good, good care yourself and your heart! 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

  10. First Night Design May 12, 2017 / 1:49 pm

    If I hadn’t already bought Untangled, I’d definitely take you up on the offer. I can’t read it at the moment as I need light and cheerful while I face the prospect of open-heart surgery but when that’s over….!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Alexis Rose May 12, 2017 / 1:21 pm

    Thank You so much! That means a lot to me!! 🙂

    Like

  12. gifted_and_misunderstood May 12, 2017 / 1:16 pm

    After reading that, I had to buy the book! You write beautifully. I’m looking forward to reading your story of overcoming and strength.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Opinionated Man May 12, 2017 / 12:01 pm

    Reblogged this on HarsH ReaLiTy and commented:
    Get a free ebook today! Check out this giveaway!
    Note: Comments disabled here. Please visit their blog.

    Liked by 1 person

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