The Mirrors in our Life

This past year has been a time of change. Some of it wonderful, healing, inspirational. Some of it sad, disappointing, shocking, leaving me stunned. That’s the beauty of understanding impermanence. Things change, everything changes and we change with it. Sometimes it’s been easy to let go of things, with a nod to the experience, other times it takes me months to process, understand, and accept. Sometimes the changes have been quite personal, other times on a national or global level.

The most valuable lesson I’ve learned the past year is to acknowledge the mirrors in my life. Sometimes these mirrors were the ones that ripped the mask off and exposed the person I didn’t want to be. Discontented, bitchy, clinging to things that no longer serve me, or trying to please people who try to control me, leaving me feeling less worthy. The other mirrors, the ones I gravitate towards the most are the ones who reflect back who I want to be, who I am without any masks. The person I have been working hard to become, losing the shame, the perfection, letting go of the control and coming from a place of love and altruism. Both of these mirrors have been important in my life.

Another most important mirror I need in my life is the mirror that reflects my struggle with healing from trauma.  Sometimes the loneliness and pain from managing my PTSD symptoms feel unbearable. I ask myself what am I doing and why? I have to watch that I don’t go down the slippery slope of denial and convince myself, that my life was easy when I had my memories repressed. I was living an inauthentic and never be vulnerable life. It was awful, I was miserable on the inside. The only thing a mirror reflected back at that time was fear, shame, terror, and a vague sense of invisibility.

I’m happier now with the kinds of relationships that being both vulnerable and authentic has brought me. I no longer have the people in my life who want me to act a certain way, act accordingly, hide any emotion except happiness.  I have kept some wonderful stood-the-test-of time relationships and formed new ones who are my mirrors, and I am theirs. It’s reciprocal and that brings a feeling of contentedness.

Some days, its still a lot easier for me to be someone’s mirror, then to accept the goodness that they reflect back to me. But I’m working on it.

When I get down, and the exhaustion of healing begins to get the best of me, I stop and acknowledge the wonderful mirrors in my life.

When I need reassurance on those really, really bad moments, I ask,  “What am I doing?” and hear mirrored back to me“Healing.”

 

 

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photo image, pixabay

 

 

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Thank you for reading my memoir, Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph

http://www.amazon.com/Untangled-story-resilience-courage-triumph/dp/1514213222

https://www.amazon.com/Untangled-story-resilience-courage-triumph-ebook/dp/B013XA4856

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43 thoughts on “The Mirrors in our Life

  1. Ben Aqiba February 9, 2017 / 2:38 pm

    Alexis, thank you for sharing this great post with us

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Alexis Rose January 16, 2017 / 4:33 pm

    Thank You! Im glad we’ve connected.

    Like

  3. tessbloggs January 16, 2017 / 3:56 pm

    This is so beautifully written! I just discovered your blog and I think your posts are really amazing. Stay strong X

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Alexis Rose December 15, 2016 / 6:59 pm

    Thank You! What beautiful lyrics. Thank You for sharing this with me. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Anna Waldherr December 15, 2016 / 5:53 pm

    A beautiful post. You reminded me of the song “Mended”. Part of it goes like this:

    “When you see broken beyond repair
    I see healing beyond belief
    When you see too far gone
    I see one step away from home

    When you see nothing but damaged goods
    I see something good in the making
    I’m not finished yet
    When you see wounded, I see mended”

    May you continue to heal. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  6. mariewilliams53 December 14, 2016 / 10:25 pm

    Your final two lines are so inspiring! I think I might ask myself that same question from time to time.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Alexis Rose December 2, 2016 / 12:45 pm

    Thank You! And thank you for reblogging this! 💕

    Like

  8. Alexis Rose November 18, 2016 / 2:41 pm

    Thank You! On this awful rainy/snowy day you brought tears of gratitude to my eyes and turned my blah morning around. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Alexis Rose November 18, 2016 / 12:48 pm

    I would love to be included in Small Steps up the Mountain. I feel so honored that you have asked me to be a part of this. Thank You so much! 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  10. watchingthedaisies November 18, 2016 / 12:18 pm

    I wonder if you would agree to be featured in my “Small Steps Up Mountains” post next Monday? I would like to include links to “Why I Write,” ” With Hope I Can Conquer Mountains” and “The MirrorsIn Our Life.” I know you already inspire many people with your writing. Many thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. emergingfromthedarknight November 17, 2016 / 7:18 am

    Its so lovely to hear the way you have been growing. Its so encouraging. Healing takes time and work and the gifts do come. I am so glad you are enjoying those gifts. ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  12. summerstartstoshine November 16, 2016 / 6:06 pm

    It’s a AMAZING connection we share. So what if we’re seperated by an ocean 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:50 pm

    Thank You. You are also not alone. Many of us are here to support and give the courage to keep going and healing. 💕

    Like

  14. albatrosswingxoxo November 16, 2016 / 5:48 pm

    Hey there Alexis, you are doing a bang up job of handling your PSTD, I just got diagnosed with it too. You are not alone in this fight. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:34 pm

    Thank You! That means a lot to me! Take good care today 🙂 Alexis

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:33 pm

    We have a super-high powered across the sea mirror. How cool is that?!🙋🏻🙋🏻

    Liked by 1 person

  17. watchingthedaisies November 16, 2016 / 5:24 pm

    I feel very humbled by your honesty and by this really heartfelt post. The mirror quote says it all. Take care.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. summerstartstoshine November 16, 2016 / 5:17 pm

    😘😍😁😆😇 You’re amazing. Mirror mirror on the wall Alexis Rose is the best of all 😂😆🙋🙆

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:08 pm

    Thank You! I really appreciate this! Have a wonderful day. Alexis 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:06 pm

    NOW, Im glad I pressed publish! Huge smiles two days in a row! ❤️👭❤️😁

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:05 pm

    Thank You! Im glad its resonates with you today. It was something I needed to write this morning as I was reflecting over the last week. Have a good day my friend! ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:04 pm

    Thank You! Love that we are on similar paths. 🙂

    Like

  23. Alexis Rose November 16, 2016 / 5:03 pm

    So well said Shelley! Lots of love and hugs to you! You are One of my dearest mirrors. 💜💚💙

    Like

  24. dbest1ishere November 16, 2016 / 3:44 pm

    Wow this is really nice…and inspiring at a time I need it the most!

    Liked by 1 person

  25. shellb39 November 16, 2016 / 3:01 pm

    Thank You! For being so honest with yourself and reflecting this on to me and so any others! What is in one is in another, the good, and the not so good! Recognizing this in my self has opened me to seeing the light in people. Tiny cracks that shine through their tough exterior walls. In this connection of reflecting I believe our mirrors, whether conscious of them or not we are shining our strength and goodness into the universe! Hugs to you dear friend! I love this post! 💕💖💕 Shelley

    >

    Liked by 2 people

  26. Liz November 16, 2016 / 2:48 pm

    I love this way of thinking, that the title of this his post brings. Wishng you many more wonderful tims ahead. x

    Liked by 1 person

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