It doesn’t matter if it is cold, hot, sunny, snowing or raining.
There is no telling when it’s going to strike.
Are they alive or dead?
Is that pain real or echoes from pain long ago that
Resurface with a memory?
It’s like being held hostage by your mind.
Is today the day I am set free?
I look like everyone else.
I know the difference between right and wrong.
Yet in my head I sometimes can’t remember
The last ten minutes of my life, or what day, year or time it is.
Are those smells read or is that a smell from a place and time when I
Was being held against my will?
Am I really hearing the sounds of helicopters, planes,
Cicadas, and birds?
Or is that the sound coming from a place that no longer exists and
Should never be talked about?
I want so much to be like everyone else.
So I will keep pulling myself up the rope.
Out of the clutches of PTSD and all the skeleton hands of the past that
Keep trying to pull me down.
My job is to live, so I can live.
That’s all I can ask of myself if I am going to have a future.
©Alexis Rose
Thank You, I will most definitely do that! 🙂
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You’re welcome to surf thoughts of my journey through poetry too, any time!
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Thank You!
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Stay strong and thanks for sharing your journey
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Thank you!
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Suffering PTSD myself, I recognise everything in your very moving words. I would like to endorse the words of bodyelectricweb.
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Thank You! I totally get it about describing dissociation. If its about losing time, or being disconnected from my body, or Who is That in the mirror. Its hard to describe sometimes isnt it! Someday hopefully hopefully we wont have to describe it. Someday ❤️
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That so describes PTSD. I have been trying to describe dissociation and it’s just so difficult. It takes different forms and I’m not past or present and that nothingness is just so scary.
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Thank you so much K E! I hope you enjoy it! 💜
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Hey luv! Just bought your book – will let you know when I’m done and have completed an Amazon review.
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Thank You Emily. I really appreciate your comment. Have a wonderful day today! 💜
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So expressive, I truly believe that art is the key to helping us understand each other! Thank you for sharing!!!
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No way I can lose with the wonderful supportive we have here! ❤️❤️💖
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You will conquer it, or at the least, kick its face in. You’re above those skeletons on the rope – so you’ve got an advantage. And you’ve got all of us cheering you on.
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Beautiful and sad and true.
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I’m glad and it’s true…we’re all unique and we just have to learn to love ourselves just as we are… ❤
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You just brought a HUGE smile to my face. ❤️❤️❤️
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Beautiful Alexis! You don’t have to be like everybody else, you only have to be just like you…that’s it darlin…you got this…. 🙂
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Cant wait to read it! ❤️
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You’re very welcome darlin-I’m just grateful to have found someone brave who speaks my language. I will have a stab at poetry tomorrow, eek! It’ll be a challenge and different to my usual writing Xxx 😊
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Thank You for sharing this. I really appreciate you and your support. ❤️❤️
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Thank You! ❤️ Alexis
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Reblogged this on I SING THE BODY ELECTRIC and commented:
Another reblog-a quality poetic description of life in the clutches of PTSD xxx
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this is beautiful. thank you🙂💗
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Thank You! I most certainly will. XO Alexis
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Love this piece, I hope you conquer it x
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Thank You. I find more peace each day. ❤️
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beautiful
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PSTD sounds harrowing. I hope one day (sooner rather than later) you can find some kind of peace x
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Thank You! Writing and healing is my freedom 🙂 Alexis
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This is very moving, and a very accurate and relatable description of what PTSD from childhood trauma is like. I feel just like this myself, so had to leave a comment encouraging you to keep writing, and I hope writing will grant you some freedom from your torment xxx 💛
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